Sleeposcope: what your sign says about your sleep

Sleeposcope: what your sign says about your sleep

Pisces, Aquarius, Sagittarius or Aries... did you ever consider how your sign affects your sleep? Some are trying to escape sharks, others are traveling with the Vikings, and the third have nightmares about green elephants biting their ears.

Does something completely special happen to you while sleeping? It’s very possible that your astrological sign has something to do with it. Read on to find out (for fun but maybe also for real) what’s hiding behind the stars…

Aries believes sleeping is too simple.

Staying awake the entire night – this is their main challenge. And when they finally fall asleep, their corns are placed in the fighting position, so that nobody happens to wake them up.

Taurus forgets to take clean bed linen from the drycleaner’s.

They furiously fall upon everyone who dares to wake them up. When they sleep they want their peace and usually snore very loudly. If they get drunk they snore a duet!

Gemini is simply not tired, but when he falls asleep he sleeps like a log.

Not even a tank wakes him up in the morning and needs to be lifted from the bed by a forklift.

Cancer worries about how others sleep.

He constantly tucks in the one sleeping next to him and doesn’t dare to move to avoid waking somebody up. He usually dreams about his child somewhere in the Caribbean.

Leo is afraid to move in bed because there’s a chance he might tousle his hair.

He sleeps on an orthopedic pillow to avoid having a painful neck, and he uses a woolen blanket. If you distract him during his sleep, he will roar for some seconds and will then fall back asleep.

Virgo wakes up every now and then to put the pillow and blanket in order.

They love sleeping on silk and being pampered. Their worst nightmare is a night spent on hay full of snakes.

Libra is deciding the entire night what to wear tomorrow. 

She has 5 different pillows on her bed because she doesn’t know which one suits her the most. But she nevertheless kicks everything from her while sleeping because she’s dreaming of being in a fight with a mad panda.

Scorpio dreams his next victim and sharpens his sting.

He sleeps like a king and keeps everyone away from himself, as he knows everyone is afraid of him. If you really have to wake him up, do it from a safety distance.

Sagittarius can’t stop thinking…

About the better things he could do if he didn’t have to sleep. Before sleeping time he reads books about astrophysics, playing a chess game with some Russian, and makes sit-ups on the bed already early in the morning.


Capricorn comes last to work and goes first to bed.

All near and far pizza boys know him, as he’s too lazy to cook. Of course he’s in bed, which is why the bed linen remembers everything he ate during the weekend.  Capricorn has only one strategic plan in his life: napping.

Aquarius sleeps badly, as he’s behind the computer the entire night.

He’s addicted to instagram, snapchat and facebook, which is why his friends haven’t seen him for quite some time now. He drinks black coffee and can’t be seen at weekends, as he sleeps through the entire Saturday and Sunday or chases Pokemons from under the sheets.

Pisces have tumultuous dreams about past lives.

Pisces fantasize about a passionate relationship with a Hollywood stud or a diva and kicks all around the bed at night. Sometimes they snore but will never admit to it.