Time to Say Goodbye to Your Old Mattress

Time to Say Goodbye to Your Old Mattress

Saying goodbye is often very hard in life, and saying goodbye to an old mattress is no different. After all, you’ve probably been sleeping with it (pardon, ON it) for years, so it’s perfectly understandable that you might be hesitant to replace it with a new one. If nothing else, explaining to it that you’ll be throwing it away after everything you’ve experienced together sounds extremely unpleasant. No worries, we have some great advice on how to say goodbye to your old mattress without causing offense. 


If you friends mock you for your old mattress…

…simply admit to your old mattress that you’ve had plenty of great times together in the past years, but it’s time to move on. There are things like memory foam and innovative independently-moving foam springs that support any body type no matter the size or weight, and the lack of all these things just makes you an outcast in your society, a pre-historic joke of a sleeper, so you simply need to buy a comfortable modern mattress to start fitting in again.


If your new better half hates your old mattress…

…your old mattress will understand that you simply need to comply in order to have a love life. Rest assured that your old mattress, despite being there when you first started discovering the joys of sharing a bed with another person, knows perfectly well that movement is supported much better in newer mattresses with modern technology, so remaining with the old one would only hinder your sex life. 


If your old mattress just makes you feel dirty…

…because of all the dust, bacteria, sweat and other stains that have accumulated in or on it in all the long years of use (and can’t be cleaned no matter how hard you vacuum, rub or pour water over it), just admit to your old mattress that you’ve learned your lesson now and thus decided you’ll be sleeping only on hypoallergenic mattresses with great airflow that keeps you healthy, clean and well-rested through the nights from now on.


If your old mattress always feels just a little bit uncomfortable…

…because it’s too soft for your old body or too firm for your sensitive body parts, just explain that there are now mattresses out there that are so cleverly designed that they fit most people’s sleeping needs as they can easily adapt to any sleeping position or sleeping situation, whether it be tossing and turning all night or sleeping just on one side due to an unfortunate injury…


If your old mattress takes too much space when moving…

…just be blunt about it and say that there are kind people out there nowadays who ship a mattress in such a small package (about one fifth of its unrolled size) that it would be a sin to stuff the old mattress into your car and drive to the other side of town, raising suspicious glances all along the way. It’s so much simpler to just order a new mattress to your new place and enjoy all the above-mentioned additional benefits, right?


If your old mattress is worried you won’t get along as well with the new one…

…you just explain that the new mattress you are planning to buy comes with an amazing offer of trying it out for 101 nights, completely free of charge, with the possibility of returning it if things don’t work out. But it only seems fair that you also admit that things probably will work out, because you’ve heard from countless people how amazing the Napsie mattress really… 

Uh-oh! 

Now we have “accidentally” spilled that we had Napsie in mind throughout the article whenever singing praise to modern mattresses… Oh, well, if the secret is out now, you really might want to replace your old mattress with a Napsie as soon as possible, what do you say? Or do you need to read the whole article through once again to see how awesome Napsie really is compared to your old mattress?